понедельник, 20 октября 2008 г.

freedom mortgage





She loved him like he was
The last man on Earth
Gave him everything she ever had
Heapos;d break her spirit down
Then come lovinapos; up to her
Give a little, then take it back...
Lord he loved to make her cry...

"Broken Wings"

Written by

C. A. Walker

7/27/2008

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"I dont understand why you stay with him?" Kelly said in confusion, and shaking her head as she and her sister inlaw pushed their carts slowly

down the supermarket produce aisle early that afternoon.

"Really," Katie tried to her best to sound convincing. "He is nice, and he is there for me and the girls." She said earnestly.

"But he treats you like shite." Kelly stated, as she checked a tomato for ripeness.

James and Katie Martin had been married for 13 years, together they had 3 beautiful daughters. Patty, Stacey and Caitlyn. Jim was a hard working man and he provided well for his family. Katie had been working late nights in a quaint little pub when they had first met. She had been going through a nasty divorce for over a year, friends and family set her up on blind dates trying to help her get back into the dating scene. Slender and petite, she had short red hair, olive skin and striking chestnut colored eyes. She was a beautiful woman. Yet when she mentioned her 12 year old daughter men seemed to run like puppies with their tails between their legs. She was at the point of giving up on finding anyone ever again when he came in.

James was lean and tall. A towering 6apos;5, James was tan and had blonde hair and the most beautiful blue eyes Katie had ever seen. She was drawn to him almost instantly. They spoke for hours after her shift that first night, speaking of anything and everything. Family, religion, polotics. The conversation had them both on a high. Night after night for almost a week James returned, staying to talk to Katieafter her shifts and then to walk her home after. When she told him about Bethany, he was eager to meet her. He was everything Katie had dreamed about and more. He wrote her poems, sang to her. He bought her flowers and candy for no particular reason, and danced with with her in the rain. He even seemed to be winning Beth over. Taking her to football games, giving her 20 quid a week to buy whatever she wanted. Talking her mum into letting her stay up later than she was meant to. He was quickly becoming part of the family, and Katie was falling harder and harder in love with him.When they married however, things slowly began to change, and for all the good, there was another side that began to emerge, a darker side that he seemed to keep well hidden. A side that Katie had vented about to close family over the years. A side that she was venting about today to her sister in law.

"You BITCH" He spat out in his usual nightly drunken rage. He slapped her hard. Her cheek stinging and red, she fought back the tears she felt forming inside her, as she brought her hand to her cheek. She had learned early on that crying only made it worse on nights he was like this. "Where is my GOD DAMN dinner?" He questioned her, his eyes darkened with anger and reddened and bloodshot from the alcohol. "I told you I was meant to be home at 10" He stated bitterly as he glared down at her.

"I didnt get off work til 8 love, and my mum had another fit when I went to pick up the girls ..." Katie tried to explain but James cut her off

"Do you honestly think I give a rats ass about that old hag?" He said almost laughingly. "Your so pathetic." He said cooly as Katie started busying herself in the kitchen, gathering things up to make James his late night supper. "Dont bother." He said bitterly, following her around

"Iapos;ll do it my GOD DAMNED self." He said pushing her aside forcefully knocking her back flush against the kitchen counter. "I dont know why I even married you. I dont even love you." He spat out angrily. His words peircing her heart like a dagger. "Just get the FUCK out and leave me alone." He demanded as she watched, still in shock from what she had just said. She watched as he pulled open the cupboard door and grabbed a can of tomato sauce. She jumped when he slammed the cupboard closed and heard the sound of metal clang loudly against the countertop. He felt her eyes on him, he knew he had hurt her and she was trying not to cry. Part of him knew he was out of line, but the other part, the one that seemed to grip him more and more told him she deserved it. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. She looked like a child, a weak little child. He felt stronger now, powerful. And for a split second, he felt a tinge of guilt. That feeling angered him all the more. Turning, he looked at her. He saw the tear streaked cheeks. And for a split second, Katie thought she saw what looked like a smile play over his lips. "I said leave. NOW" His voice boomed out loudly and made her jump once more. She hesitated, but knew better. She obliged.

Katie shook the memory from her head, she had alot to do and little time to do it in. She knew James would be in by 11 tonight and would be expecting his dinner ready and waiting, especially after last night. Katie and Kelly had finished their shopping and were now met up with Beth at the clothes store on Market Street. Katieapos;s 50th birthday was in a few days, and Bethanyapos;s girlfriend Cameron was flying out for the special occasion and would be meeting her family for the first time face to face. Katie and Bethany decided that new clothes were needed for this occasion. The three of them not at all shy crowded into one big changing room that afternoon. Beth noticed the bruise on Katies face the minute the two women arrived, but didnt question her mother about it. An hour later though, when Kelly left and Beth caught a glimpse of the black and blue bruise in the middle of her mothers back, she couldnt stay silent any longer.

"What the hell happened mum?" Beth asked, slightly louder than she intended to though she already knew the answer. Her blood boilded from anger as she listened to Katie recount the details for her.

"It was an accident love." Katie finished. "Im sure he didnt mean it." She said, hoping to calm her daughter. Beth looked at her mother in shock.

"An accident??" She said and stormed out of the dressing room past her mother. Gathering up the rest of her things, Katie quickly followed after Beth. The two hurriedly walked in silence for several moments. Bethany spotted a small out door cafe, walking up to the gentleman at the till, she handed him a tenner and placed their orders. Finding a table, they sat and Beth finally broke the awkward silence. "How many more accidents are you gonna have mum? You arent the same happy go lucky care free woman you were mum." She said, hoping Katie would realize that she needed to break free. "Gran sees it, Aunt Kelly sees it. Mum Uncle Collin is worried about you too." She stated matter of factly between sips. Remembering breifly the first time it had happened. She recalled coming home from school and seeing her mother curled up with a blanket around her legs, her body shaking violently as she sat crying. Dropping her bookbag in the door, she ran and sat with her mother, draping an arm around her, she pulled her close.

"Whats wrong mum? Whats happened?" She was afraid. She had never seen her mother cry before, at least, not like she was right now.

"Its nothing love." Katie said, furiously wiping at her tears. Beth saw at once the blood and bruises that covered her mothers face.

Though she wanted to ask the question that was already burning her lips, she didnt. She already knew the answer she would get.

"James and I just got into a little fight is all, Iapos;ll be fine"

"Kelly told Collin?" Katie asked, her voice sounding a bit hurt by this. "Remind me not to tell her anything bad love." Katie said quite non chalantly.

"Heapos;s ya bro mum, heapos;s got a right to know." Beth argued.

"So is this what you lot do then love? Talk about me behind my back?" Katie asked her daughter, as she felt a sudden flush of embarassment.

"Poor Katie this and poor Katie that? Is that how it is then?"

"No mum its not like that at all." Beth said trying to reassure her mother. Reaching across the table and taking her mothers hand in hers and giving it a gentle squeeze, Katie caught Bethapos;s eyes. "We just want whats best for you mum. We love you." She said, trying her hardest to hide the fact that she felt as though she could cry at the drop of a hat.

"Anno love." Katie heaved a sigh. "We best get on then." She said suddenly as if the conversation had never taken place.

Three days later at the party in her honor, Katie Martin seemed to shine. The red dress she wore made her hair and eyes stand out all the more. Her silver necklace accentuated her neck. And her earrings dangled freely. With the body and looks of a woman in her mid to late 30apos;s, It was hard to believe that she was 50 years old today. As people ate, drank and conversed with one another, Katie seemed to effertlessly glide from conversation to conversation at ease. People complimented her left and right. Family, friends and strangers. Children, teens, men and woman of all ages. Each one speaking of how "young" she looked. "Stunning, absolutely stunning" One gentleman had said after buying her a birthday drink at the pub. She felt, for the first time in years, like her old self. Even James noticed it. Perhaps that was why when he noticed her polite conversations with the men that evening his mood slowly but surely changed that evening.

"Who was that man earlier?" James asked as he stood watching Katie begin to undress in their bedroom.

"What man?" Katie asked, removing her earrings one by one, a look of confusion playing on her face as she tried to rack her brain.

"The man at the pub, he bought you the drink?" He asked stepping behind her. His anger was building. He felt it rising.

"Oh. That man, I dont know love. A friend of Collins I think" She said. James watched her. He didnt know how she could be so casual about something like this. A stranger openly flirting with her, and her doing nothing to dissuade him. He felt a fury like nothing hed ever felt before overtake him. I gripped her forearm tight in his massive hand and in one swift movement spun her around to face him. On her face was a mixture of shock and fear. Something about it pleased him.

"FUCKING SLUT" He hissed out as he all but pushed her to the bed. "YOUapos;RE A filthy whore." He said as he pushed her down and straddled her, and began to pummel her. He felt a rush as his fists pounded and punched against her flesh. She tried to sheild her face from the blows, as he hurled insult after insult at her. She tried to wiggle free, her dress ripping. She cried, she begged him to stop. But he continued. Down the hall, their daughters huddled together freightened listening to Katies anguished cries.

"Make him stop Caitlyn, make daddy stop." Patty whispered to her sister tears streaming down her tiny face.

The phone stirred Cameron from her sleep, sitting up she saw Bethapos;s half naked body rushing around the moonlit room.

"Whats going on?" She asked, her voice groggy with sleep as she watched Beth slip into a pair of track pants. Grabbing a hoody from her closet, Beth turned to face Cameron. She saw a look in Bethapos;s eye that she knew she never wanted to see again. She was shaking with anger.

"Its James." Beth said. Cameron knew what she meant, and quickly climbed out of bed.

"Cam, the girls..." Beth whispered as they entered the house. "Get the girls and take them

up to my Granapos;s. Uncle Collin and Aunt Kelly apos;r staying there." Cameron gave Beth a quick kiss.

"I love you" Cameron said as she raced down the hall to the girls and quickly and quietly ushered them out of the house. From outside they could hear both Katieapos;s and Bethapos;s screams.

"OPEN THIS FUCKING DOOR YOU BASTARD" Beth shouted pounding on the locked bedroom door.

She could hear her mother whimpering. "IVE GOT THE POLICE ON THE PHONE" Beth shouted as she jiggled the doorknob furiously, hoping he would buy her bluff. Beth felt helpless and hopless as she tried and tried with no avail to open the door. She hated knowing what was going on in that bedroom, hated the images that kept playing in her mind. She saw Katie looking as she did that first time, if not worse. Her heart pounded, and she knew that each minute that door was closed was another blow to her mothers esteem. Cameron and Collin showed up 15 minutes later completely out of breath and shaking.

"Stand back" Collin ordered the girls, and with a few swift kicks of his foot, he kicked down the door.

Collin rushed over to James grabbing him by the shoulders and hoisting him up flush against the wall. James winced. Again Collin pushed him into the wall, harder this time. Collin felt something wet against his bare foot, glancing down he saw the puddle of urin running down Jamesapos;s pant leg.

"Aint so tough now are ya?" Collins face was inches away from Jamesapos;s, his breath hot, as he kneed James in the groin. Sirens wailed out in the front yard, and two police officers and a paramedic entered the room.

Cameron and Beth sat with Katie. Battered and bruised, she lay on the bed bloodied and crying. Beth held her mother close much as she did the first time. Craddling her, stroking her hair.

"Its alright mum." She said as she began to cry. "Youapos;re safe." Beth said trying to comfort her mother.

"Heapos;s not going to do this ever again." Beth kissed the top of her mothers head. "I promise."

James Martin was taken to jail, and the following morning Katie, with the help of her family moved in with Beth. After that night, she found it more and more difficult to keep defending the man who over the years, she realized had broken her. Though in her heart of hearts she loved him and she knew she would for a very long time, she also knew she had to let go and rebuild what he had destroyed. She knew it would be a slow process, nothing good comes overnight. She knew it wasnt going to be easy, there was so much damaged inside of her that she felt beyond repair. But she also knew that with the strength and support of her family and friends she could keep going. She knew that right now though she was broken, in the end, what she would find inside herself was a woman with strength and courage. Like a catterpillar in a cocoon, she knew she would be transformed into something different when it was all said and done. And with everything in her, she would spread what were now broken wings and fly.

The end



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